


Forcing Eyes Open

by DustyTales



Series: Somewhere in the Middle: A SpiderDevil Series [2]
Category: Daredevil (TV), Marvel Cinematic Universe, Spider-Man - All Media Types
Genre: Coming Out, Homophobia, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-29
Updated: 2019-04-24
Packaged: 2019-05-15 16:48:54
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 4,258
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14794287
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DustyTales/pseuds/DustyTales
Summary: Coming out of the closet is, and always will be, a multi stage process.Now that Peter is a serious part of Matt's life, he no longer has the luxury of not correcting people's natural assumption that all people are straight. All he wants is for his friends and his partner to get along, but certain confessions will have to come first.But surely his friends will take it well... right?





	1. Played Close to the Chest

Matt sighed, and sighed again for good measure. He wasn’t _good_ at shit like this. It was a surprise Matt managed to have friends given how hard he found talking about his life. At least… he felt like he had friends. The Defenders were more than just teammates at the very least, but he knew he’d get more than a few punches if he tried to talk about “friendship” with those guys.

But this wasn’t The Defenders. This was his best friend. His former secretary too but… they were friends too right? Now’s not really the time for that debate though. Now was the time for action damn it, he told Foggy he’d stop keeping secrets and he was going to _try_!

Being more honest with each other was one of the conditions Foggy had laid out when agreeing to keep their friendship in tact following the collapse of Nelson and Murdock. Things had gone well between them, even better since he’d started working with The Defenders. Foggy appreciated Matt having someone to watch his back as Daredevil, so he should be happy to hear someone is watching his back as regular old Matt, right?

He wasn’t really sure how Karen would feel given he’d almost dated her but… friends are honest with each other, damn it.

And they’re honest with each other… right now.

“So… um…”

“I do not like the look you’re giving me.” Foggy deadpanned.

The three were at their favorite shitty bar, drinking shitty beer and catching up now that Karen had an exciting new job. They tried to go out once in a while, it was _good_ for them. And as much as Matt didn’t want to ruin their good time, this was one of the few times Matt, Foggy, and Karen were all together nowadays. And he had to tell them sometime. So he was telling them now.

Damn it.

“So remember how I promised to be more honest with you guys?” Matt started nervously.

“I am immediately both interested and terrified.” Foggy answered.

“I swear this is good news!”

“Good news as in ‘it wasn’t as bad as it could have been’ or good news as in good news?” Karen sassed him with a skeptical look.

Matt snorted. He probably deserved that, but still. Ouch. “If you’re not interested in hearing about my new partner than I _won’t_ tell you.”

“Who are you working with _now_?” Foggy asked, sounding completely exasperated.

“Not that kind of partner!” Matt exclaimed, getting rather frustrated himself, “Partner like… a… uh…”

“Romantic partner?” Karen supplied with a raised eyebrow.

Matt coughed nervously before choking out “Yeah. That.”

Foggy’s face immediately lit up, Matt could hear it in his voice. “Oh my God! Who is she? Do we know her? She’s hot isn’t she? She’s always hot, I swear to God how do you _know_ -”

“You sound like a preteen girl.” Karen teased, “Let the man talk.”

Matt gave Karen an appreciative nod. “I never actually said she.” Man pointed out, “You know I hate words like boyfriend and girlfriend, it all sounds juvenile, but uh… ‘boyfriend’ would be the correct one to use here.”

Foggy’s eyebrows shot up. “ _Really?_ I had always thought that was just a college phase, ya know? Getting a taste of everything. But… wow. Good for you, man.”

“Wait, you’re gay?” Karen asked.

In her defence, she sounded confused rather than offended, but Matt had to hold back a sigh.

“I swing both ways.” Matt answered smoothly, “It’s been awhile since another man caught my eye, admittedly. It was easier in college, the environment left people more open to it.”

“Nothing’s gay in college.” Foggy added with a grin.

“So you’re bisexual?” Karen tried to clarify.

She still sounded very confused, and Matt tried to be gentle despite the irritation he felt under his skin.

“I guess, though I don’t see the reason to label it. I dated women in the past, I’m dating a man now. It is what it is. It never came up before, and now it has.”

“I’m not trying to pry, it’s your business.” Karen deflected, “I just… so who is this guy? Foggy sure had a lot of questions for you, didn’t he?” She nudged Foggy, who jumped.

“Oh, uh, yeah. Tell us about this guy, Matty! How’d ya meet him? What’s his name? And the question ‘is he hot?’ still stands.” Foggy shot finger guns, with accompanying noises, and the tension melted away.

Matt gave a small laugh, smiling just as much to himself as to his friends. It felt good to be open. And he found that he _wanted_ to gush about Peter. So he did.

“His name is Peter. He works for The Daily Bugle and his boss is _obsessed_ with superheroes. You might know his name from the pictures he takes of Spiderman? Peter says they’re ‘awesome and dynamic’ but I can’t exactly confirm that.”

“Wait, you’re dating the guy from the paper? Holy shit Matt, the stuff he takes is so clear there’s a conspiracy theory that Spiderman is in on it!” Foggy jumped in.

“He is.” Matt answered simply, “Peter knows Spiderman, I think they went to school together or something. Peter won’t tell me who Spiderman is, but I haven’t exactly pried him either. I can respect a secret identity.”

“Woah!” Foggy answered excitedly, “That’s so cool! So like, Spidey poses for Peter and that’s why he’s the only one with good pictures?”

“Yep.”

“Does Peter know about you?” Karen asked. Her voice was… strained. Matt realized he needed to proceed with caution, or risk opening old wounds.

“....Yes.” Matt admits hesitantly, “When we got a little more serious, he saw some of my scars and… I’ve learned that lying to the people you care about isn’t a good idea.”

This must have been the right answer, because Karen seemed to relax.

“Did he take it well?” Foggy asked gently.

The amount of lies Matt had to tell to protect Peter’s identity made his stomach coil, but this wasn’t his secret to tell. Karen and Foggy did the same thing for Matt, after all. Surely they’d understand.

Matt sighed. “It was… an ordeal. It took a lot of explaining. But I’m not the first vigilante Peter’s dealt with, so he came around. Though he seems to have told ol’ Spidey to keep an eye on me so I don’t come home so banged up.” Matt gave his friends a cheeky grin, trying to lighten the mood.

“Come home?” Foggy repeated with a grin. “Just how serious _are_ you two lovebirds?”

Matt coughed, caught off guard by this question. But he shouldn't have been surprised, Foggy was incredibly nosey. “Oh, uh, pretty serious I guess? He stays over a lot, at least, he lives in a hole in the wall in Queens and he says my place is nicer.”

Peter almost always crashed at Matt's on nights they patrolled together; Matt simply had a nicer bed. But it wouldn't actually be at lie to tell them a little bit more…

“He also likes to see me in one piece after rougher nights so… he tends to clean my less serious wounds rather than Clair.”

“Sounds like you're in deep.” Karen teased.

“Why can't you have pictures of your boyfriend like a normal person?” Foggy grouched as he pulled out his phone, “Now I gotta Facebook stalk the guy to see his face. What's his last name?”

Matt was just glad to be away from the heavier topics, so he supplied “Parker.”

After several seconds of tapping Foggy must have found his mark, because he cried out, “Oh my God, he's a _twink!”_

Matt recoiled indignantly. Peter Parker was not a twink! He was thin, and shorter than Matt, yes, but he was solid; the wiry kind of muscular that didn't have big guns to show for it. Not to mention he had super strength. Twinks cannot have super strength. Surely that's a rule written somewhere!

“He is _not_ a twink!” Matt defended his partner, offended on his behalf.

“He is absolutely a twink.” Karen agreed, looking over Foggy’s shoulder at his phone. “He's a _child_ Matt, what the hell are you thinking?”

“He is most certainly not a child!” Matt snapped, “He's 23! He may look younger than he is, though I don't know how I could be expected to know that, but he is an adult! I can't believe you would insulate I would prey on a _child_!”

Karen jumped, putting her hands up in a motion of surrender. “Easy, Matt. I didn't mean that literally. But it looks like you're a decade older than him.”

Matt snorted in indignation, “I am not a decade older than him. But yes, he's younger than me by a decent margin. But he's got an intelligence to rival just about anyone and he… he makes me happy, okay?” Matt didn't realize how desperate he sounded until he voice broke on his last word. He looked away, embarrassed.

There was a pause.

“Okay.” Foggy answered.

Matt looked back at him. “Okay?”

“Okay.” Karen echoed.

“If he makes you happy than we’re happy for you.” Foggy agreed.

Matt smiled, heart clenched tight in his chest. “Okay.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'd like the point out I intended Karen to be blunt, not mean, so if she comes across as homophobic please know that wasn't my intention and I adore her as a character. I, however, have a bit of a difficult time pinning down how to write her, so I hope my intention came across.  
> I also hope you can be patient with me on the next chapter, as I have a series to rewatch before I'm ready to write it.


	2. The Importance of Knocking

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which The Defenders come to play

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning: this chapter contains no sex, but does contain post-sex cuddling and references to said sex

Matt was sprawled on his couch, shaking in aftershocks and wrapped in a blanket. His head was on Peter’s chest, thick limbs splayed awkwardly across the younger man's thin body.

But somehow, everything was perfect.

As Matt lay across Peter, occasional trembles would wrack Matt’s body. They'd talked about this, they both knew what this meant: It wasn't just Matt’s hearing that was sensitive, it was  _ everything. _

Sometimes intimacy was a little too much for Matt, though he swears the dazed state it leaves him in is pleasurable. He swears it's the only time things actually feel quiet. So the couple lay in silence, holding each other, letting Matt bask in the silence before his brain comes back online and begins bombarding him with stimuli once again.

But Peter enjoyed these moments just as much; only this sort of sensory overload could leave Matt this boneless.

It was beautiful.

Peter took the time to burn the image of Matt this  _ relaxed  _ into his brain. He ran his hands gently across his scarred back, occasionally peppering his skin with kisses. But all of it soft, butterfly kisses, for the softest touch left Matt shivering in this state and that wasn't what Peter had planned for tonight.

But Peter was quickly learning to never plan  _ anything. _

The nice thing about having a superhero boyfriend is absolutely nothing can sneak up on you. Unless, of course, said boyfriend is currently in a sex coma. The fact that the most intimate moment possible is the one where being interrupted would be easiest is a thick, thick, irony.

When Matt’s front door slammed open, Peter jumped, but Matt clearly _ panicked _ . He gave a small shout and jumped away to the other side of the couch, tangled, and therefore covered, by the blanket. This left Peter fully exposed to the intruders, but at least Peter had the foresight to pull on his boxers before settling in for the long haul. 

_ “What the fuck?! _ **”** Peter shouted, scrambling to his feet.

The group of people at a door looked familiar somehow, but Peter was too panicked to connect the dots. Before him stood the angriest women he'd ever seen, a man whose appearance screamed “rich white boy” and- wait is that-

“Luke Cage?!” Peter gasped in disbelief, “I've seen you on the news, you're the bulletproof man! But that means-” he looked to the other two “You're The Defenders?!”

“Who the hell are you?” the women who Peter  _ thinks  _ is named Jessica asks in a monotone almost-growl. 

“Would it kill you guys to knock?!” Matt snapped rather than answering, and when Peter turned he saw Matt had taken Peter's moment of distraction to retrieve his pajama pants, “The door was  _ locked  _ did you break my door again, Jess?!”

“The door actually wasn't locked, in her defence.” pretty-white-boy-who-would-later-be-revealed-to-be-Danny said as he casually strolled into Matt's apartment and plopped down on a kitchen chair.

“We interrupting something, Matt?” Luke asked, eyeing Peter but shooting a teasing grin at Matt.

Peter was shocked into silence, which was rare. Someone should probably write that down, even.

“Surprise, surprise, when you barge into people's homes unannounced you tend to interrupt things!” Matt snapped again.

“Sweet little boy toy you got here,” Jessica comments, pinching Peter’s cheek as she passes to join Danny in the kitchen. 

Peter stared indignantly at her, before turning to Matt with a glare “Matthew, I swear to God, if one more of your friends calls me a boy I'm bringing back the stubble!”

Matt blinked in surprise, before sighing, “Babe, you hated the stubble, you said it made you look homeless.”

“ _ At least I looked like a fucking adult-” _

“Did you just call him babe?” Danny interrupted, already eating a sandwich (without a plate) he had stolen from Matt’s kitchen.

“Why are you here?” Matt asked, exasperated.

“To ruin date night, apparently.” Jess sassed, popping the cap on a beer she had snagged when Matt wasn’t looking.

Matt just groaned, pinching the bridge of his nose to stave off an oncoming headache.

“Come on, Matty boy, aren’t you gonna introduce us?” Danny grinned with his mouth full.

Matt snorted audibly. “Danny, Jess, Luke, this is Peter. Peter, these are my idiot friends with no sense of boundaries.”

“I can see that.” Peter deadpanned. Peter should probably be embarrassed to be in his underwear in front of a bunch of strangers, but given said strangers barged in _ without even knocking  _ this was a sight they were just going to have to deal with. Peter was just glad they hadn’t shown up 10 minutes earlier, or they’d have  **really** gotten an eyeful.

“Now  _ why  _ are you  _ here?! _ ” Matt demanded again.

“You offered us your old files on the Jefferson case, remember?” Luke answered, causing Matt to groan.

“That couldn’t have waited until morning? At my office?”

“Nope.” Jessica shot back, taking a long pull from her stolen beer.

“Make yourself at home, why don’t ya?” Matt grouched as he stumbled into the bedroom to retrieve his briefcase.

#Peter could only maintain eye contact with Danny for a few seconds before the pretty-boy's cheeky grin and roaming eyes left him flustered. He averted his gaze and began to search the living room for his clothes.

“Gotta say, I knew Matt was a freak but even I'm shocked by the whole “underage” thing.” Jessica snarked.

Peter, when had been bending down to look under the couch, shot bolt upright and scowled at the women indignantly. “I am  _ not  _ underage!” 

“See?” Danny said, grinning at Jess, “Even Matt's not that fucked up.”

Peter grunted, turning his back on the two. No wonder Matt didn't hang out with these guys much.

“Looking for these?” Luke asked, smiling slightly to himself as he offered Peter his discarded pants.

Peter was getting very sick of these people's wandering looks, but after a quick glance at the pants, he smiled. “Considering the mess Matt made on those, no.”

Luke jumped back, dropping the clothes with a startled shout.

Danny and Jess burst out laughing.

“You deserved that.” Matt deadpanned as he entered the room. He shoved a packet of papers against Luke's chest. “There. Now please, get out.”

Danny's smug grin still hadn't left his face, even as he rose. “I'd ask you to join us, if you weren't so busy gettin’ busy.”

Peter interrupted before Matt could retort. “Yes, imagine all of the fantastic gay sex we could be having if there weren't three idiots here.”

Jessica slapped Matt on the back as she passed. “You sure know to pick em, Murdock.”

Matt crowded them out the door and slammed it shut behind them. Slumping with his forehead against the door, the blind man let out an exasperated groan.

Peter came up behind him, wrapping his arms around Matt's waist and standing on his toes to rest his chin on his lover’s shoulder.

“So,” Peter began brightly, “I think they like me.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Only one chapter to go! Don't know when I'll have time to write it though as I have chronic illness and am currently fighting social security on giving me disability. So wish me luck with that.  
> I also plan on writing how Matt and Peter met but I don't know if that will come before or after the next chapter.


	3. The Difficulty of Hearing

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Peter moves in, and Matt hears too much.

“I can’t believe my own  _ boyfriend  _ would use me like a  _ pack mule _ .” Peter whined dramatically as he lugged another load of boxes up the many stairwells to Matt’s apartment.

Matt snorted, arms also laden with bags and boxes. “It’s your fault for owning so much shit.”

Peter grunted with exertion, setting the boxes on the floor in Matt’s living room. “Not everyone is interesting the whole “I don't need material possession” montra.”

“It’d be easier to get you moved in if you did, though.” Matt snarked, smacking Peter on the butt as he passed.

The spider let out that indignant squak that Matt adored, and the older man laughed.

A voice from the hallway cut in.   
“Um… Mr. Murdock?”

Matt had paid two of his teenage neighbors to help move Peter’s things into his apartment. Most of Peter’s furniture had been pawned off on craigslist given how much nicer Matt’s apartment was, but there were a few things Peter had brought with him; his pc, his consoles, and more importantly, his television. Although Matt and Peter could have theoretically carried the tv up the stairs on their own, Matt felt this was a but too much of a stretch for his “helpless blind neighbor” persona. 

Thus two teenage boys stood in Matt’s doorway with Peter’s television balanced between them. Matt had heard them coming up the stairs, but it wasn’t until he heard the uncomfortable stutter of their pulse that Matt was reminded men showing open affection for other men was not something most people were used to.

Matt took a quick step away from Peter and coughed. “Oh! Uh… Pete, why don’t you show them where you want that?”

“Right, right… Um, follow me.” Peter mumbled awkwardly, motioning for the teens to follow him into the living room.

Matt ducked out of the apartment to escape the situation, but kept his senses trained on Peter and the boys as he went down the stairs. Even all the way out on the sidewalk Matt could hear Peter's nervous heartbeat. He felt awful; Now Peter was going to be embarrassed around the two boys for as long as he lived there.

Matt sighed to himself as he pulled the last few boxes from the back of the car. Peter had managed to convince MJ to lend him her car in exchange for dinner with the couple. Matt had to prepare for that: MJ was nice enough, but she seemed to thrive on making people uncomfortable.

The two teens bounded down the stairs as Matt was about to close up the trunk.

“Is that you, Mark? Gavin?” he called as the two exited the building. After all, Matt shouldn't have been able to tell who it was he was hearing.

“Yes, sir.” Gavin, the older and deeper voiced teen replied.

“I think I have everything out of the car, but I need a set of working eyes to double check for me.” Matt gave the boys a charming smile, hoping it would ease the awkwardness.

Mark, the younger of the two teens, maybe only 14 or so, seemed to relax somewhat.

But the blind man felt Gavin’s heart actually pick up speed at his grin, which Matt struggled not to react to. Mark poked his head into the trunk to check for any more boxes and the more flustered teen grabbed another load of boxes to take upstairs. Matt's mind began to race: Why would his attempt to act as if everything was normal make this  _ worse? _

But alas, he could only feel how the boys reacted, not read their minds. He suspected he'd just have to accept the awkwardness when they passed in the halls from now on, and hope for the best.

 

Once all the boxes were inside the apartment and the furniture in place, Matt paid the teens and sent them on their way. Initially he had considered asking them to help get Peter set up a bit more, but the discomfort when ever Matt or Peter spoke to Gavin was so noticeable it was making Matt nauseous. He couldn't stand to have them in his house anymore, even if he knew this was partly his own fault.

Due to the loss of two sets of hands, unpacking became quite an endeavor. Peter set up his new desk in the corner of the living room and Matt passed him the boxes that sounded like they had electronics in them. It was easy enough to tell them from clothes by sound, at the very least.

It took them most of the day to get everything squared away. At last, the couple collapsed on the couch, worn to the bone. Matt had hoped to spend the next few hours resting up and maybe listening to music so they'd have the energy to patrol tonight.

But life always seemed to have other plans.

As Matt stretched out on the couch with Peter's head on his chest, it became harder to block out the sound from the apartments around him. Usually it wouldn't matter much, but tonight the conversation he picked up made it impossible to turn off his brain.

“I’m telling you, John, the guy’s a faggot.” Matt heard.

That was Gavin. Speaking into a phone, based on the slight static and the tinny voice that responded to him.

“What, living right next to you?”

“Down the hall, yeah.” Gavin grunted “Some other little fag just moved in with him. Doesn’t look much older than me.”

“Isn’t the blind guy like 40?”

“Something like that. Freak groped the kid right in front of me!”

“Seriously? There’s a fucking pedophile in your building?!”

“Matty?” 

Peter’s voice snapped Matt’s attention away from the boys’ conversation. He sat up a little bit, refocusing on his partner. “Wha?”

“You heard something, didn’t you?” Peter prodded gently.

Matt blew out a long breath through his nose. Peter’s ability to understand Matt without him having to explain himself was part of why they worked so well together.

But it also made it hard to hide things from him.

Matt removed his glasses to scrub at his eyes. Peter plucked them from his fingers and set them on the coffee table, causing Matt to let out an appreciative grunt.

“I can tune out people talking. It's harder to turn out people talking about us.”

“The neighbors are already gossiping?” Peter asked, puzzled.

The blind man shook his head slightly. “It's one of the kids who moved you in. Called us fags. Said I'm a pedophile.”

Matt wanted to pretend it didn't bother him. He really wished he could let it roll off his back. But somehow…. He just couldn't.

Peter snorted in indignation. “What an asshole.”

“He's just a kid, Peter.”

“And kids are assholes.” the younger man insisted.

A smile twitched at Matt's lips, but it faded as he let out another long sigh. He distantly picked up on words from neighboring apartments, and as much as he tried to ignore it, words like “fag” “queers” and “predator” seemed to be coming from all directions and from countless mouths.

He flopped his head back against the arm rest.

“Why does it always have to be such an  _ issue?”  _ he groaned. “I haven't been this happy in years and yet everyone seems to have a Goddamn problem with it!”

Peter knew Matt was very upset at this point: Matt almost never used the Lord's name in vain.

Peter was silent for a long moment. He cuddled close to his partner and burrowed his nose into the crook of his neck. 

Matt turned his head just enough nuzzle into Peter's hair. He focused hard on his lover's familiar heartbeat, and let it's rhythm drown out everything else. Peter shifted a little to mess with his phone, but Matt didn't move. He kept his senses focused on the perfect pulse of the man stretched in his arms.

When the music came on, it was soft. It still startled Matt a little, but not enough to be unpleasant. 

_ “This place a palace of light drawn with shade _ _   
_ _ Of silence and pretence a token of our trade” _

Matt perked up slightly when Peter took his hands, dragging him to his feet.

“Dance with me.” Peter said, but the way he forced Matt close made it clear it was not a request.

Matt couldn't help but crack a smile, dragged this way and that by his partner, more bounding around his living room than actually dancing. Peter’s laughter was musical, and suddenly not a single sound mattered but the warm bubble Peter had created around them.

Matt let out a soft gasp of surprise when Peter began to sing.

_ “I want you to know I still love you _ _   
_ _ Even though we've been dancing on broken glass” _

Peter had a soft tenor tone that brought a feeling of overwhelming safety to Matt’s heart.

_ “Parade all your memories for the moments we shared _ _   
_ _ Never fade away.” _

Did anything else really matter? Did the people whose voices he could no longer hear even really exist?

Matt laughed as Peter twirled him in spite of their height difference.

_ “I want you to know I still love you _ _   
_ _ When I walk down the memory lane _

_ Where the night swears its love to the stars _ _   
_ _ There will be no more tears today,” _

And in that moment, nothing mattered but them.

_ “Hey, hey.” _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The song referenced is "Dancing on Broken Glass" by Poets of the Fall  
> With this chapter finally done, there is only one part left of this trilogy, and said part will be only one chapter. I doubt I'll be done with these boys after that though, I have several spin off one-shots in mind. So stay tuned!


End file.
